It is all about your thoughts and your words. Which of course would lead to your actions!
I lost my darling sister last year, 12th June 2008. She was only 37 years old.
It was only after her demise that I walk down memory lane of my time spent with her. Only by doing so, I understand why she turned out the way she was. I tried blaming myself of my role in her life but was brought to my senses that all decisions were made by herself.
Everything we do or decide to do has got options. We always have choices and we are the only one who can make a decision for ourselves. Even if we let someone decide for us, it is us who decide to allow the someone to make such decision for us. If we do not allow, noone can do anything. In final words, we walk out our own path of life.